I’ve had a lot of surgeries, especially recently, so when I was looking at one of my scars the other day, I remembered my poor surgeon who was visibly uncomfortable that, for all the care she took to keep my parathyroid scar from looking like someone slit my throat, it looks like someone slit my throat. LOL They usually turn dark purple (not a bad color mind you!), thicken, and rise to a nice mountain ridge.
I’ve always been that way. You’ll never believe where/when I got this one. It was when I was a teenager and I was having my first cyst removed from my left wrist. In those days, they tested you to see how long it took you to stop bleeding before the surgery was done. They did it with a tape that had two tacks on it. It just lightly poked through the skin. Well, almost 40 yrs later, I still have the scar! Crazy, huh?
As I was in the shower the other day (That’s where I do my best thinking. I think the hot water stimulates the brain cells.), it occurred to me that, while I do scar very easily on the outside, I don’t scar very easily on the inside. Here’s what I mean.
When I encounter someone who hurts my feelings, I usually give them the benefit of the doubt. I figure they didn’t mean to be hurtful or they didn’t realize they were being rude or they are going through something that is clouding their thoughts…so I cut them some slack and decide not to be offended. Even if I know the person meant to be mean or cruel, I usually look for the reasons behind why they might be this way. When my husband was fired without cause, I could see how the owner of the company might be paranoid and harsh due to his difficult family situation…so I chose to forgive and move on.
It struck me that I might be stuck with the scars on the outside of my body all the rest of my days, but I can choose to move past any scars on the inside of my soul. I think this is something society has forgotten in recent years. Everyone, these days, seems to be offended by everything! It’s getting so you can’t say hello anymore without someone taking offense.
If you’re going through hard times, trials, difficulties, dark days, you have enough to deal with. You don’t need to pile more on top like whipped cream and a cherry. Yes, I’ve had people think I’m making a mountain out of a difficult molehill. Yes, I’ve had people say unkind things to me because they don’t understand. No, I don’t think we should necessarily frequent their company while we are still deep in trial and in need of support or comfort. But, yes, I do think we can still find it in us to let things slide, pick our battles, choose to forgive, and/or just move on. While it might very well save a friendship, it will save you added difficulties!