I’m in the middle of working on the rest of the Finding Joy in the Trials series. I promise to get some more out soon, but until then I had to share this. Over the last several years, I’ve seen several memes on Facebook that said something like:
“I’ve heard that no matter what you’re going through, someone has it worse.”
Not only is that dismissive of someone’s trials, but it causes people to feel afraid to reach out to those who can be supportive and helpful. Further, while we are all dealing with struggles, each one handles things differently. What we need during times of stress is uplifting not shaming.
It doesn’t help you to know that somebody has a more dire problem or is more in debt. What you need are answers. It most certainly can help you to know that you aren’t alone, but the first thing someone needs when they are hurting is to know they are understood and that their feelings are valid.
Can we all agree to be uplifting rather than dismissive? Could we choose to help and support first before we tell someone their needs aren’t important? Let’s let the first thing out of our mouths be, “I understand” or “I’m so sorry” or “What can I do to help?”