So far we’ve talked about distraction and deception, two of the four things Satan uses to keep us from our joy, our purpose, and our Lord. The next tactic that Dr. Stanley talked about was division.
“But He, knowing their thoughts, said to them: “Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and a house divided against a house falls.” – Luke 11:17
It’s no surprise that one of the most important issues the chronically ill have is loneliness. We become isolated due to the lack of energy and the pain we deal with on a regular basis. That doesn’t allow us the ability to visit with friends and family or even hold a job. Isolation leads to a dividing us from our support system, our church family, our livelihood, and can eventually lead to losing our relationship with our Lord and Savior.
Little by little, we find ourselves alone much of the time questioning if our family and friends really love us. Busyness is a staple in modern life. Parents with young children are busy earning a living and running from activity to activity. People with lots of family around are busy with family events. Working people are busy working their way up the corporate ladder and business owners are busy wearing lots of hats. Very few take the time to reach out to people who they don’t see often.
Even people who aren’t busy don’t usually reach out to those they don’t see often. Top of mind is not just a sales technique, it’s a human rule of engagement. And, by the way, it isn’t just confined to the healthy.
That’s the reason nobody calls us, but there are reasons we don’t call anyone else either.
1. We’re afraid of seeming needy.
2. We are not comfortable asking for help.
3. We may not be able to keep a date to meet others elsewhere.
4. We don’t feel comfortable inviting people over because we may not have cleaned our house in a while.
5. We may not feel like entertaining, but we’d like someone to be with.
6. We don’t have an Any Time friends who we feel comfortable having over to just cry with us.
Once we have successfully, though unintentionally, isolated ourselves from others we begin to question if anyone really loves us. We may question if we are worthy of love.
So, how can we lift our isolation if we can’t get out and be with people? Fortunately, I have some ideas and technology plays a large roll.
1. We can become active in online groups and social media. Just because you can’t see someone’s face, doesn’t mean we can’t socialize! Online groups can help us feel connected. I run one of them on Facebook called, coincidentally, Life Beyond Surviving. Come join us!
2. We can start a blog, visit and comment on blogs that speak to us. Some blogs like this one are specifically for chronic illness, but others, like several others I write, are for fun. Have some fun! Be inspired. Be uplifted.
3. Start texting with friends you can’t get to see. I do that with my children, my family, friends in other states, and even with friends nearby that are not able to get away to be with me.
4. Call people on the phone. Use Skype. Keep in touch any way you can. It doesn’t take being in person to perk up your social life. Just talking to people will keep you from feeling isolated.
5. Ask anyway! Ask a friend to come over. It doesn’t have to be a formal thing that makes you feel you need to spend three days cleaning for. Just ask a friend. Talk to them. Be with them. Don’t worry about the dust. Don’t worry about being a burden. Most of the time, they will be happy to be asked in.
“But He, knowing their thoughts, said to them: “Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and a house divided against a house falls.” – Luke 11:17
Next week, I’ll talk about the final part of Dr. Stanley’s message, but for today, promise me you’ll invite someone over, make a phone call, reach out online, or comment on some social media or blog posts. How about starting with this one? LOL